March 24, 2011

be okay

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March 21, 2011

grind, daily.

This weekend was NUTS. Let me just give you a briefing on what occured.

Friday, I was rushed around afterschool to go to a show at Mac's Bar in Lansing. I rode in a trunk with WH everywhere we went, attempted to play chess in the trunk, got accidentely high off gas fumes, (we didn't know the can had fume-age until Jake told us to hand him the can and then the can was about to explode.) almost had my first upchuck in the bar, got mulitple bruises from "brutal" skankers and moshers and crazed fans, got spit on, got sweat thrown on me, talked to beautiful boys with beautiful stretched ears, met several of the band members, then I got to spend the night with my lovely girlfriend, Milly. I didn't shower until the next morning, which is disgusting because I was covered with nasty shit and sweat and it was gross. I don't think I've ever felt more relieved to get in the shower in the morning.

Well, maybe I'm being a little dramatic about the shower thing,
I've gone to shows in the summer, and thats about as nasty & sweat covered you can get.

Saturday, I just barely got home when I was inspired to go get things for my stupid, waste of effort senior project. So, I called my right hand hoe and got ready at her house to go to brighton. We picked WH and Sublime up and took their asses with our asses. One of two miracles happened to me during this time,

#1) I lost my liscense in Milanas car I guess, so my checks weren't working at PetSmart and my idiodic minions were off looking at some exotic fish shit, so in the midst of my freaking out, the guy behind me payed for my degu's chew toys. I started crying from being so happy and relieved. This made me realize how good the world actually is sometimes and I felt so greatful.

#2) Went through the Starbucks drivethrough and right when I got to the window a very attractive guy started talking to me like we've known eachother for years. The last thing I said to him? "Oh, I mean, you don't look old, you look like you're like 21 though." This is stupid of me and I should be beat with a bat many times because I should have asked for his number.

So after our trip to Brighton, Morgz and me came home, ate several pickles, played battleship&Clue then ate dinner with her family and the boys.

I made her go for a walk, two actually. Tyler too. Then I proceeded to mack on some kid that has the same music taste as me to the tee and is a libra, both are such attractive traits that when I'm around him I don't know what to do with myself. Being around a fellow air sign is refreshing. Hes also quiet so hes hard to figure out.

In any case, hes intriguing and a hillarious sleeper.
I don't know if I'd ever make out with him though.
Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Sunday, Came home from Morgz house and hung out with my sister all day.


This weekend was boss. I'd replay it over and over again if I could.

March 16, 2011

the truth is

I wish so badly I could hate you. I would never talk to you again because I don't talk to people I don't like and I surely don't talk to people I hate.


I wish I could love you, you deserve that from me, but I don't feel the same way. I don't ever think I will love you. I don't ever think I'll be good enough for you anyways.


I wish I never would have permed my hair, its hard to be looked at so weirdly sometimes, even if it does make me "different".

March 15, 2011

discovery

How am I supposed to tell you no when I like boy attention?

I complain about you all the time and I have other guys that pay PLENTY of attention to me. Shit I could even be with one of them right now if I wanted to. But here I sit, pissed and happy with you wishing when you kissed me it wasn't out of spite of her and wishing you'd just stop fucking around with me. I don't find it cool at all that you make me feel so good and so bad. But mostly just bad.

I wish I were as mean as I put myself out to be.

March 14, 2011

I could sleep well if only I tried

Sometimes, I hate boys and wish I really were lesbian. Like seriously, I wish the rumors that spread because of my hair were true. It would be easier, but then again not because I'd have a bitch problem all day everyday because of a girl friend. I guess that happens when you have boyfriends too. This is why fwbs are good and I've made out with 63 people.

Can't sleep as usual.